Seems Reasonable

After learning of the recentish assertion that Mormons don't live in the real world, it occurred to me that if we live in a fake world, doesn't it make sense that we would worship a different, fake Jesus?

Making of a Man or Woman

I'm going to start off this post with a journal entry I wrote at age 13:

It's weird to think that Joseph Smith was only about 14 when he had his 1st vision. When I was about 5, 14 was way old, so it wasn't a big deal. But now that I'm closer to his age, and I know what it's like, it seems incredible. I mean, I can't imagine any of the 14 year old boys I know having a vision.

One summer when I was five or six I went to a day camp. I didn't know the counselors' last names, which stressed me out because it felt wrong to call these people, who seemed from my perspective to be adults, by their first names. I expressed my concerns to my mother, who told me that using their first names was fine, and they were just teenagers anyway.

By the time I was in high school, I found it odd when other teens considered themselves to be basically grown up. We were all still immature kids. More self-sufficient than we had been, sure, but kids all the same.

When I was about 12, I thought I would never feel like I was old enough to date. Well, it turns out I did. Right around the time when I got old enough to date. So I thought that maybe it would work out that way for other milestones. But it turns out that for one, at least, it didn't. The use of the word "woman" in reference to myself. I have actually called myself a woman once or twice, but it just doesn't feel right. Some of my peers I am comfortable with calling men and women, sometimes, but then I'll turn around and call them boys and girls in the next sentence.

In the media, as far as I am aware, people are referred to as men and women from the time they turn 18, when they are legally adults. I suppose it's good to have a distinct cutoff point, and that is probably the most logical place they can put it, but I sometimes find a news story humorous or just absurd when I read or hear about a 19-year-old woman. After all, I often think of people in their late 20s as boys and girls these days.

Going back to my high school years, at some point then I noticed that when a young man left on his mission, he seemed like a boy to me. When he came back, he seemed like a man. So I thought that could be what made a boy into a man. But now when I meet recently returned missionaries, they often seem like little boys to me.

But maybe the mission definition was on the right track. Not that it is a rite of passage that turns all boys into men, but that real outside life experiences, serious responsibility, hard work, service, sacrifice, and devotion to something higher than yourself are the major factors in the change.

Possibly becoming a man or a woman is the sort of thing that is never completely done. It definitely is not something that is done all at once.

Maybe people just keep going back and forth between being kids and adults throughout their lives.

Firestarter

As a teenager I noticed that I could take two guys who were equally attractive, equally nice, equally intelligent, both with great personalities, and one would interest me but the other wouldn't. I could find no explanation for why certain boys would grab my attention more than others.

In one of the last three The Work and the Glory books by Gerald Lund, Kathryn Ingalls tells her husband, Peter, that she doesn't know why she loves him. I think this is shortly after Peter tells why he loves her. Anyway, I tend to be that same way - I really don't know why I like or love somebody. I can list attributes of theirs that I like, but I can't say what it is that brought that spark, changing my feelings from a fairly indifferent or slightly fond, "He's a good guy," to something more.

Deck the Walls

Over the years I have thought a lot about home decorating. Not so much coordinating the rugs to the drapes to the throw pillows, but holiday decorations.

Well, I was recently thinking about an Easter wreath I saw featuring bunnies (it was cuter than it sounds) when I realized that there really aren't many religiously-themed Easter decorations. Which actually makes sense. You can have a lot of nativity scenes around at Christmastime and everything's great - they are generally cute or beautiful. But to have tons of images or figures of Christ hanging on the cross or sweating blood in Gethsemane would be a bit morbid. And if you tried to make it cute, it would be even more disturbing. And sacrilegious. And to fill your house with empty tombs would be a bit weird. Like displaying random rocks - not pretty ones or rare ones, just rubble that you might have picked up while prepping the garden.

Still, given that I consider Easter to be the most religiously significant holiday, I don't feel right about completely ignoring the religious side in my decorating. So I have now made it my goal to find at least a couple tasteful decorations that I can get out and display in my home specifically for the Easter season.

The Many and The One

I recently read an MSN relationships article about how to be a man magnet. The advice in it was not particularly revelatory, except that I apparently need to perfect the art of sexting. Somehow I don't see that happening anytime soon. I guess I'll have to live without the hordes of men flocking to me.

But what I did find interesting was that one of the man-magnets they interviewed was one who had only been single for a total of three months during her fifteen years of dating. And since this was an article on how to attract a lot of men and not how to build a strong relationship, I would expect that the boyfriends she had during this time numbered more than two. So this woman we are meant to learn from spent, at most, an average of six weeks between 'official' relationships, which in this case would have average out to have lasted not quite five years each. That seems like a pretty short time to properly move on from such a long relationship. Of course, even three five-year relationships doesn't qualify someone as a man-magnet to me, but however many relationships there are, there does not seem to be an appropriately long break between.

Maybe she wasn't really all that invested in her relationships. In that case, it seems like a huge waste of years she could have spent finding someone she really liked or else learning valuable things with her independence.

Or maybe she just bounced around from rebound to rebound. Once again, a waste of time and energy.

And assuming that she did over these fifteen years have relationships that really meant something to her but she was able to properly recover before moving on to the next man... what are the chances that she would be able to find a good man to date so quickly after each recovery period? Yes, there are a lot of good men out there. But a good man who she finds attractive and fun to be around and easy to talk to and interesting, and who sees the same qualities in her, along with that extra spark, enough to form a serious relationship with, is not quite as common. And it is my opinion that if two people do not see in each other everything I mentioned in that last sentence there is really no point in having a committed relationship.

I really don't feel the need to jump around from boyfriend to boyfriend. Sure, hearing that it only takes one isn't particularly comforting to the girl who just wants to be going out and having fun. It also isn't particularly comforting when the lack of dates makes her wonder if she just isn't attractive. But there is a difference between going out with a lot of different boys and being in steady relationships with lots of different boys. The first one involves getting to know them, having fun, and learning what you like. The second involves cutting down on your opportunities to meet someone who you really would like and learn from.

And even if I don't have a multitude of boys coming after me, that's okay. I'm going to just be myself, live my life, and trust that in doing so I will attract one man who will bring me more satisfaction than a long stream of suitors. And I'm going to do that without sexting.

Distraction vs. Discrimination

I just read that Santorum opposes legislation that is about to pass allowing women to serve on the military front lines. He claims that because men tend to be protective of women, they would worry about the women and be distracted from doing their own jobs. This made sense to me.

Then I read the handful of comments that were showing at the bottom of the page. One of them mentioned that soldiers are already concerned about the men they serve with and manage to get their jobs done, so why should adding women change that? This also made sense.

So, in a very dangerous situation, would a man be significantly more concerned about the welfare of a woman than he would that of a man in the same situation, assuming both to be strong, healthy, fit, and competent? Having never been (a) male or (b) working with others to accomplish an important goal in life-threatening conditions, I find this impossible to answer.

Me as a Fangirl

I like Shawn Spencer as a TV character. But if I had to actually interact with him in real life he would drive me crazy. I've known this for a long time. But yesterday I realized something else. While I do like Shawn, he is not one of my favorite characters.

If I were the type to go all fan-girl over a fictional character, it would probably be for one of these:

• Rory from Doctor Who
• Graham from Once Upon a Time
• Doyle from Angel
• Possibly Hodgins from Bones. I haven't properly watched many episodes, but I really like him from what I've seen with it playing in the background.
• Possibly Vic from What I Like About You. It's been a while since I watched so I'm not sure how my feelings about him compare with the others, but what got me to watch the show was the Val/Vic storyline toward the end of the series.

And the thing that ties them all together? I could see them getting along perfectly fine in the real world. They could be my friends or my neighbors or my coworkers. Or all of the above.