A Real, Adult Testimony

When I was a little girl, I loved to go up on Fast Sundays to share my testimony. I remember being so excited about having my chance to speak and eagerly asking a member of the bishopric whose turn it was to go, and how extra thrilling it was when it was my turn.

I noticed that when adults bore testimony, they tended to tell stories, while children's testimonies tended to be more straightforward lists of beliefs and thanks. Then one Sunday when I was about 7 years old, one of the older Primary girls went up to the stand and included a story with her testimony. At that point, I wondered when I would be able to share a real, adult testimony with a story included.

A few years later, an elder was speaking in our ward. It may have been part of fast and testimony meeting; it may have been an assigned talk. I don't really remember. What I do remember is that he said that the typical listing of beliefs and thanks given by little children isn't a real testimony. I don't remember a thing about what he said after that. Dad later talked to us all about what the missionary said, but I still was left with the impression that according to this missionary, what I had to say during testimony meeting was not a real testimony. So for a time after that, I stopped going up.

Well, I have shared my testimony several times since then. Not as often as I had when I was 4, or even as often as when I was 7. But I do on occasion. And when I do, I'm generally pretty straightforward. At the core, my testimony consists of a list of things I believe and know. There is a God who loves us. Christ lives. Our prayers are heard. There is a prophet on the earth today.

And that simple list is a real, adult testimony.

Another Random Thought

Our sacrament hymn this last Sunday was #190, In Memory of the Crucified. As I sang the line "May thy sweet Spirit here abide," I briefly thought of how the term Sweet Spirit has come to mean an unattractive girl.

And then I wondered what the Holy Ghost looks like.

A Sense of Proportion

This post uses in discussion a plot point from The Restaurant at the End of the Universe by Douglas Adams. It is not necessary to have read the book, but if you'd like to avoid spoilers for it, you may not want to read this now.

Teaching Children

On the first anniversary of the September 11 attacks, my history teacher had us write how we would explain the attacks to our future children. It was an interesting exercise, looking back: seeing something from our experience and our lifetime as an event that would be studied in similar history classes in the future as well as showing that what we were studying in that class had impacted the lives of real people. Well, it had that potential, anyway.

My city decided to hold a moment of silence at 11:00 this morning. The Bishop informed us of this during the announcements at the beginning of Sacrament Meeting so we would know what was going on if they set it off with sirens or something, and so we could participate if we so desired. It would be during the transition between Sunday School and Relief Society/Priesthood, so wouldn't affect the adults' lessons. I, however, would be in Primary. Because I have never bothered to memorize the exact start and end times of lessons - knowing what time to get to church and about what time I'll be leaving has always been enough for me - I wasn't sure whether I would be in class or in Sharing Time. But I did know that if they announced the moment of silence with sirens, the kids would be curious about what was going on. And so I thought a bit about what I would tell them if our class was disrupted. And I wondered whether hearing about it would scare them, and if so how I could help them feel safe, or if it would seem so long ago as to have no meaning in their lives. After all, 10 years ago none of them had even been born.

Well, the class wasn't disrupted. Apparently the city trusted everybody to realize that it was time to be quiet on their own. But the possibility started me thinking about when I will be teaching my own children. Will I be telling them about September 11 as a one-time thing when they are older and able to understand complex topics, in a manner similar to the paper I wrote in class? Will I teach them a little bit at a time as they're ready to hear it? Or will the topic just never come up and I leave it entirely to the schools? I hope I will do it the second way, a little at a time. That seems to be the best way to handle most topics. But I worry that I'll end up going with the third because it just doesn't come up and I don't think to bring it up or can't find a way to do so.

Best Friends Forever

It's confession time again.

Sometimes I like to read those dating and relationship articles on MSN.com. It's mostly an entertainment thing. After all, most of those articles are one person's opinion and experiences presented as absolute truth. I definitely am not going to go date a guy who is all wrong for me but has great abs just because some online writer put that on a list of things to do before I get married And it's fun to laugh at the lists of 50 things women wish men knew - about half of which are blatantly untrue. For me, at least.

But mixed in there are some not so fun ones. Griping, bitter ones. Lists of annoying things that couples say or do. I sometimes read those ones too. And most of the things listed I see nothing wrong with. But the one I least understood was on a list of annoying relationship cliches.

"I married my best friend."

I was a little bit stunned to see that on there because I had always thought it was about the most romantic sentiment out there. After all, who doesn't want to be married to somebody who always has their back, whose company they enjoy, and around whom they can feel completely comfortable just being themselves? Then I read the commentary on it:

"Of this, a married girlfriend of mine writes, 'Oh, you're so unique! Your spouse is your BEST FRIEND? Wow. My husband is probably my favorite person to spend time with, but … I have a lot of great friends in my life.' This one is true. Perhaps your spouse is your closest friend, or your best guy friend, but he doesn't have to be your end-all, be-all. So stop making other people feel bad."

So what exactly do these people think a best friend is? Evidently not your closest friend or your favorite person to be with. No, a best friend is apparently supposed to be your only friend. An idea I thought everybody had grown out of by adulthood.

Beautiful Beast

Earlier this summer, I read a new (to me) retelling of Beauty and the Beast. As usual, at the end of the story the Beast turns human because Beauty confesses her love for and to him. Although this version didn't say much about the Prince's human appearance, he typically is depicted as being very handsome. And for probably the first time, I wondered how Beauty felt about that.

Generally in the story, it is a good thing - she is able to see past his exterior and love him for who he is, so she is rewarded with a handsome exterior that she can be actually attracted to. But she learned to love the Beast for who he was. And who you are does include, to some extent, your physical body.

She probably does eventually get used to and appreciate his new form. But how long does it take for her to look at him and see her Beast?

A Disturbing Misconception

One morning a few years ago when I had gone in to work a morning shift, before we all dispersed to our various posts, one of my coworkers claimed that if a boy has not had sex by the time he was fifteen, something was wrong with him. The woman he was talking to, who I would guess to be in her thirties, seemed to agree with his assessment. I felt that had to be challenged. So I said what I could think of to say at the moment, which was basically that there was nothing wrong with having moral standards against early sex. It has always felt somewhat inadequate, but was the best response I could formulate at the time.

Of course, it is not at all wrong for a boy to remain a virgin long past the fifteenth birthday. In fact, there is something wrong with a boy who does have sex that early. If there wasn't a problem before, there will be one later in consequence. I really do not want to go find the appropriate research now, but I know that aside from the spiritual issues that will come, especially if he has been taught better, people who have sex earlier tend to have more emotional problems than those who wait.

And there is something very wrong with a society where that opinion is accepted as fact.